Posts Tagged ‘funny’

My Dream House

Monday, January 19th, 2009

Recently I wrote a blog for Health & Harmony talking about what my dream house would look like…versus the one my six-year-old son just “built” for his pet Webkinz.

You can read all about it here:

http://www.healthharmony.ca/Kathy-Buckworth

Tell me I’m not alone in this.

Motherhood Hurts – When I Laugh

Monday, January 12th, 2009

On Friday night I was invited to attend the Opening Night of Diane Flacks’ one-woman show, Bear With Me, based on her book of the same name.

The play is running at the Berkeley Street Theatre (26 Berkeley Street, Toronto) until January 24th…so if you have the time to go between now and then, you should.

Diane is hysterical – I’ve only met her once before and clearly it was not enough time to appreciate her talent for creative dance (while shaking a fake pregnant belly), stuffing herself into a trunk (while miming morning sickness) and the ability to mimic everyone in her life that she met during her pregnancy and labour/delivery period.

Her impression of the mellow voiced yoga instructor going through her own personal crisis was just ridiculously funny.

Armed only with a Pilates ball, her childbirth scene was bang on.

“What’s the one question every mother asks the minute her baby comes out into the world?”

(Wait for it.)

“Did I poo?”

If you can’t get to the show, pick up her book.

If you need something more serious, I’ll be on City TV’s Breakfast Television (Toronto) tomorrow morning to talk about “Parenting Resolutions”.

Laughing more should be one for everyone.

Resolutionary Thinking

Thursday, January 1st, 2009

Happy 2009!

I’ll be kicking my year off with two shows tomorrow – starting with Canada AM and an early start (I’ll be on at about 7:40). I’ll be talking about trying to get the entire family organized in the New Year – of course with the end goal of trying to split the workload around here with the four kids. And minimize the fighting. And have a clean house once in a while. And get to the gym.

Hey, it’s the New Year – I have to at least try.

Then I’ll be driving down to the CityTV studios to talk about 3 “Resolution Solutions” I’ve been working on with the Proctor & Gamble folks. If you want a preview, go to my website and click on the Tide logo. The show will be live at 12:30 p.m., and its a phone-in, so if you can, please do.

Then I’m letting my family organize themselves, and the resolutions land where they may as I head out for a girls’ weekend skiing. There may be more apres than ski, but it’ll be a good ending to this holiday season before I’m back in the routine on Monday.

(Actually the real holiday starts when the school bus rolls by – with my kids on it. Don’t tell me you weren’t thinking the same thing.)

Happy New Year.

I Can Tell You Where To Put That Christmas Angel

Wednesday, December 17th, 2008

If one more person asks me “So are you ready for Christmas?” they may just find themselves on the receiving end of a well placed piece of tissue paper.

Is there a more annoying question? Are we ever really ready for the carnage on Christmas day? Tis truly the season of annoying questions…like these classics:

Will Santa be good to you this year?
(Which is swiftly followed up on the 26th of December by “Was Santa good to you this year?)

Mom did you mail my list to Santa yet? I want to change it.

So, visiting the out-laws this year?

Honey where’s the scotch tape?

Weren’t you going to get the teacher gifts?

Yes, the only thing more frustrating than the folks who waste their breath on these remarks are the ones who also say:

“New Year’s just not a big deal to me.”

Umm have you EVER met anyone over the age of 21 to whom it is?

Now excuse me while I go exchange the kitty Webkinz for the alligator one…

And pass the egg nog while you’re at it. That’ll get me in the mood.

Now HE’s FUNNY

Thursday, December 11th, 2008

Most writers will tell you that the best and worst part about getting a book published is doing book signings. For most of us, who are NOT Stephen King or Stephanie Meyers, this usually consists of sitting at a little fold out table in the middle of a busy retail store where shoppers frantically avoid eye contact with you. You don’t even really care if you sell that many books – you just want to not look like such a loser, mostly. But it’s always cool (and somewhat surprising) to meet people who would actually spend their money on your book.

Last night I went to Massey Hall in Toronto to see writer David Sedaris (“When You Are Engulfed In Flames”, “Dress Your Family In Corduroy & Denim”) who not only did not look like a loser, he had long lines for people waiting to sign his book, before and after the show.

And the kicker? The “show” was simply him reading from his books, radio show, and other diary entries. He was fantastic. Hysterical. Had the sold out crowd in the palm of his hand as he talked about, well, mostly HIS book tour, and his own cringe-worthy sittings in between the Frozen Food and the Tires at Costco.

I so impressed that a writer could not only turn a book reading and signing into a ticketed event, (which he is doing across North America), but I was also inspired. As a humour writer, you want the laughs. How awesome for him to hear the laughs in person, instead of missing them as someone reads his book on the Go Train and bursts into laughter (as I do when I read him), feeling themselves like a loser.

“Humour is just the truth being told quicker to you than you’re used to”, he said in his closing remarks. If that’s true, he’s one of the quickest talkers I’ve ever seen.